The Dance (or two?)

That first dance song. Sometimes it is an easy choice--the song playing when you had that first date as an example. And sometimes, well -he has the perfect song. And so does she. Soooo---use them both! The bride's choice can be that special first dance of the evening. And the groom can pick that special last dance of the evening.

"And now, it has come down to the last dance of the evening and I would like to invite our bride and groom up to the dance floor for a special song entitled '___________' . Let's put our hands together for our bride and groom as they make their way to the dance floor! "

(insert sound of WILD applause here for YOU!!!)

Where's the elevator??

When choosing a reception hall, consider your guests with disabilities. Just because everyone is the picture of health when you book your hall does not mean it will remain that way for your wedding. One unexpected guest with a disability turned out to be the bride! She broke her knee just before her wedding day. Sadly, there are many places that are not very accessible. It is not fun for a guest to sit alone in the reception room upstairs just because the cocktail hour is down a flight of stairs. Or for guests that cannot make their way to the reception room at all. The only way into the Old Mansion in Elizabeth, which no longer exists, was up a staircase. And if you needed the restroom--more stairs. Believe it or not, there are still reception hall rooms out there that are not accessible.

Some halls do have access between the floors by going outside and walking around the building. But again, sometimes the walk is just as hard as doing the stairs. Especially in bad weather.

Also consider the location of the restrooms. Is there one nearby for guests who cannot go "over the river and through the woods" to the other side of the reception hall? As an example, the large ballroom at the Richfield Regency in Verona has its restrooms down a flight of stairs. But an additional restroom is located on the same level as the ballroom for guests unable to use the stairs.

Bottom line, do not assume a reception hall has easy access to rooms or restrooms. You really need to ask.

But how do I get there from here?

Time to send out the invitations! The hall has provided you with directions cards for all you guests. Yes!!! You tuck them into the envelopes and off they go! Your guests open the invitation and are relieved to find directions enclosed. Not everyone has a GPS or access to Mapquest.

The service is over, the bubbles have been blown and the guests get into the car and pull out the directions. Lets see--from 80 and points north, 287 and points south, the Garden State Parkway, Route 46, Route 3 Arrrrrrgh! If I don't know how to get to any of these roads from the church, how do I get there from here??? Uh-oh.......

Provide your guests with directions from the ceremony location to the reception location. Receptions are much more fun when the people show up! Have additional copies at the ceremony location to pass out to the guests who forgot the directions at home. You might even include the estimated driving time and the cocktail hour start time as well. One bride even provided local businesses in the area of the reception for those who might be in need of a drugstore, Starbucks or a White Castle fix!

On occasion, I have seen directions cards provided at the reception guiding guests back to all the major highways to help them find their way home. What a great idea!

The Receiving Line

After the ceremony, most brides and grooms have a receiving line. You as a couple stand together with your parents in a line. The bridal party often lines up as well opposite the couple and their parents. As the guests exit the ceremony location, they extend their wishes to the new couple and their families and often engage in conversation.

If you have 120 guests to meet and greet, and spend just 30 seconds with each, the receiving line alone will take ONE HOUR!!! 240 guests coming? The receiving line could take TWO HOURS!!! And in making all the plans, somehow allowing time for the receiving line gets lost in the shuffle. Forgetting to budget for this time is the number one reason couples never see their cocktail hour or have a minute to relax before the reception begins.

Tip #1: Budget enough time to allow for 15-30 seconds per guest for the receiving line. If the receiving line moves quickly, you will be grateful for the extra time you now have.

Tip #2: Let everyone in the receiving line know to keep it moving. "kiss" "kiss" "kiss" ....There is plenty of time to catch up on the 20 years since you have seen cousin Billy with him at the reception.

Tip #3: If your ceremony and reception is all in one location, strongly consider skipping the receiving line all together. Typically a half hour is allocated for the ceremony followed by a one hour cocktail hour. If your receiving line takes an hour, the poor guests at the end of the line never see the food.

Reception Immediately Following...

When you book a hall for your reception, you sign a contract for a specific time.

Cocktail Hour 6-7pm. Reception 7-11pm.

Yet many invitations simply state "Reception Immediately Following".

So----let's just say your service was at 3pm. After allowing time for the service and the receiving line, your guests could be on the way to the reception by 4:30. By 5pm they have arrived and are ready to hit the food and the bar. They are greeted by a staff member who tells them the room will not be ready for an hour. Your guests cannot understand why. The invitation said "Reception Immediately Following" and they expected to eat NOW!!! They are not happy.

On the other hand, your service might have been scheduled for 4:30. It is now 6:00 and the guests are still milling around outside the church chatting. It is 6:30 before they head off to the reception. They find their place cards and head to get something from the cocktail hour. And the staff is busy clearing away the food. Cocktail hour is over!?! But the invitation said "Reception Immediately Following!"!!! And they expect to eat NOW!!! They are not happy.

If your cocktail hour is from 6-7, say so on the invitation. If your reception is from 7-11, say so on the invitation. Many guests need to hire babysitters while they attend your wedding. It is really helpful if they know how long they expect to be out.